Fat folks of the future

  — Thursday, June 12, 2025 —

Whooey, the recent heat wave was not good for this fat guy. With all my extra insulation, it's five degrees hotter inside me than inside a skinny person.

And I pity any fat folks of the future — in twenty years, 80° will be normal Seattle weather in April.

Of course, you're on the edge of your sofa, wondering what Doug's up to this week, so here's my agenda without further ado-doo:

There are two plays now playing (pun!) that I'd be happy to see — Alice in Arabialand at the Annex, and The Illusion at the Erickson. But I'm not going alone, and both plays close on Saturday, so it's a nope unless you wanna come with.

Little Pat's is fine, but it's time for my twice-yearly pilgrimage to Beth's Cafe. It's Seattle's finest greasy spoon, and if you're still hungry after eating one of their 6- or 12-egg omelets, they'll bring more hash browns for free, until you're full.

On Saturday, me and a few thousand buddies will be hanging out at Cal Anderson Park, working on our suntans and trying to save America.

Shredder Orpheus is a classic of cheap moviemaking. Filmed in Seattle in 1990, it's the Greek myth of Orpheus & Eurydice, retold with punk rock and skateboards, and it's playing for one week only at Central Cinema.

On Monday, They Might Be Giants has a free mini-concert at KEXP's studios, with limited seating and no advance tickets. My plan is to groan when I see the huge crowd, then turn around and walk a block for a burger at Dick's instead.

That's my next seven days, and if you're family, friend, former friend, acquaintance, arch-enemy, or simply Doug-curious, you're invited. Click the links for details, and/or drop me a note!

 • Please RSVP by the day before. 
 • All events are 'Dutch treat'. 
 • Please remember the basics of Doug. 

If you're planning something or going somewhere, and you'd like a fat man with flatulence to tag along, all invitations will be cheerfully considered, possibly even accepted.
 
⭐ Next update & invitations ⭐
— Thursday, June 19 —
 

Shipoopi

  — Thursday, June 5, 2025 —

❗❗ FLASH — YOU'RE INVITED ❗❗
Tuesday 6/10 — I'm going shopping early to beat the rush, and having an extra early breakfast at Little Pat's @ 7AM.

A woman who'll kiss on the very first date is usually a hussy, and a woman who'll kiss on the second time out is anything but fussy, but a woman who'll wait 'til the third time around, head in the clouds, feet on the ground, she's the girl you're glad you've found — she's your shipoopi! 

Join me for breakfast on Friday morning, and on the first and third Fridays of every month. I recommend the chicken-fried steak.

Here's what else I might or might not be up to over the next week, depending on my mood when I wake up, and depending on whether anyone wants to come with. Click the links for details, and/or drop me a note.

• Real Genius (1985) is one of those rare mainstream movies that's pretnear perfect, and it's playing this weekend at Central Cinema. Twelve bucks.

• Field Guides in Transit is performance art that'll be performed on the subway on Saturday morning. It's free, but registration & headphones are required, and Link wants you to pay the fare.

• Ever wanted to be a whale? You can be part of the Human Orca Mural at Pocket Beach on Sunday morning. It's free, no flippers necessary. 

• I'm rather fond of the Beatitudes and the Constitution, so on Monday I'll be protesting the guy who hates both. 

• Free exercise plus education, on the Secrets of Seattle’s Historic Waterfront Walk on Tuesday morning. Watch out for falling bums, though.

• If your ears have an itch for classical music, Rain City Symphony has a free concert at First Free Methodist Church on Wednesday night. Square dancing optional.

 • Please RSVP by the day before. 
 • All events are 'Dutch treat'. 
 • Please remember the basics of Doug. 
 
If you're planning something or going somewhere, and you'd like a fat man with flatulence to tag along, all invitations will be cheerfully considered, possibly even accepted.
  
⭐ Next update & invitations ⭐
— Thursday, June 12 —
 
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